Boy, I think I need to come up with a new schedule. I got a new job last week! I'm coaching my old high school volleyball team. =D Yeah, I play volleyball...apparently well enough to coach too, since my girls haven't lost yet with me as a coach (Shhh, that's only two games, but hey, it's something!)
The reason I think I need to come up with a new blogging schedule is because we have games on Tuesdays and Thursdays--so I don't get home until 9:30 or 10 some nights. Those nights make for rambly, rushed, half-assed blogs, or me not wanting to roll out of bed the next morning because I didn't get to do yoga or get enough sleep.
Like tonight.
Here is tonight's TEDtalk. It's given by a woman named Amy Cuddy, a social psychologist. Since I'm currently looking for another job to supplement my meager school district income, I thought her talk was particularly relevant to the interviews I'm bound to have in the future. She claims that she can make me more confident. That she can make me more comfortable in an interview room than I would have been without her advice. And I know there are lots of you who are in the same boat as me.
Supposedly, your body language not only influences the snap judgements of the people around you, but it can also influence your own brain and how you feel about yourself. She does all sorts of hormonal research into cortisol and testosterone levels and found that poses are a lot like smiles. If you smile--a genuine, eye-crinkling smile--you'll feel better. Smiling has been chemically proven to increase peoples' moods. That's where the whole "Fake it till you make it" saying applies. Likewise, power poses can make you feel more confident, and the smaller poses can make you feel less confident.
At about 30sec, the camera pans to the crowd and you can see how people react when someone else talks about posture. I think I made myself sit up straighter automatically for all 21 minutes of this talk because she kept saying that word: "posture". I've been brainwashed by my mother. Stop slouching, Ash. Sit up straight. Pull your shoulders back. Thank you, Mom, for ignoring the fact that good posture requires me to stick my chest out farther. I'm pretty sure that there are two assets there that might help me get a job somewhere, just maybe not any place she'd like.
What I did find out--or rather, inferred, since Ms. Cuddy never actually said this--is that showing off my assets may, in fact, make me feel more confident. By throwing my shoulders back and sticking my chest out, I physically take up more room, and I take unneeded stress off my back. I'd consider that a power pose. Bustygirl may not agree with that statement, though--the girls tend to get in the way and make us feel less confident sometimes.
13:30min is where she gets to the point in her story where she "publishes" her findings and gets an interpretation from the media. Kind of hilarious. In fact. I DARE one of you to do that.
Or even...if you're an interviewer, don't open the interview with that poor candidate looking like this. If we tend to complement one another's nonverbals, then wouldn't it follow for the candidate to become a little smaller? a little less confident? I mean...unless you're trying to weed out the faint of heart...
We place a lot of stock in first impressions, and body language has a lot to do with first impressions. We take our cues on how to approach a person based on how much space they take up in a room.
One of the questions I had for Ms. Cuddy was how to properly manage the dominance levels in the room. If you're on a team of equals, how can you still feel confident and comfortable voicing your own opinions without taking up so much space as to make your teammates feel less confident?
I think she kind of answers that question in this blog following Political Posturing--and how candidates' postures affect how much people like them. In addition to confidence, there are other factors by which we judge people.
For political candidates, two of the most important factors are their power and competence. We want a leader who can lead--who can follow up on his promises. But probably more importantly, we want a leader that we can connect with, and that connection is formed by warmth and trustworthiness. Subconsciously, we want a leader we can connect with, trust, and take care of the country. Those are high expectations we set for our president, and you know what? We've been voting based on body language for years. Why do you think Obama won back in 2008? That infectious smile of his. He had the power poses down. He knows how to own a stage without being too big. And that smile just invites us all in, captivates us, and makes us want to trust him.
So on teams, being confident in yourself is important, but having warmth and patience for your teammates will help everyone feel more comfortable and more trusting of one another.
Looking confident will help you feel confident. Go into your interviews and throw back your shoulders. Politely take up just the right amount of space. Hell, do what Amy Cuddy says and strike a power pose in the bathroom before you head in. Whatever you do, just make sure that you're comfortable in that interview. As you know, confidence is attractive--and if you get that position, you deserve a victory lap.
Happy TEDtalk Tuesday, everyone.
The reason I think I need to come up with a new blogging schedule is because we have games on Tuesdays and Thursdays--so I don't get home until 9:30 or 10 some nights. Those nights make for rambly, rushed, half-assed blogs, or me not wanting to roll out of bed the next morning because I didn't get to do yoga or get enough sleep.
Like tonight.
Here is tonight's TEDtalk. It's given by a woman named Amy Cuddy, a social psychologist. Since I'm currently looking for another job to supplement my meager school district income, I thought her talk was particularly relevant to the interviews I'm bound to have in the future. She claims that she can make me more confident. That she can make me more comfortable in an interview room than I would have been without her advice. And I know there are lots of you who are in the same boat as me.
Supposedly, your body language not only influences the snap judgements of the people around you, but it can also influence your own brain and how you feel about yourself. She does all sorts of hormonal research into cortisol and testosterone levels and found that poses are a lot like smiles. If you smile--a genuine, eye-crinkling smile--you'll feel better. Smiling has been chemically proven to increase peoples' moods. That's where the whole "Fake it till you make it" saying applies. Likewise, power poses can make you feel more confident, and the smaller poses can make you feel less confident.
At about 30sec, the camera pans to the crowd and you can see how people react when someone else talks about posture. I think I made myself sit up straighter automatically for all 21 minutes of this talk because she kept saying that word: "posture". I've been brainwashed by my mother. Stop slouching, Ash. Sit up straight. Pull your shoulders back. Thank you, Mom, for ignoring the fact that good posture requires me to stick my chest out farther. I'm pretty sure that there are two assets there that might help me get a job somewhere, just maybe not any place she'd like.
What I did find out--or rather, inferred, since Ms. Cuddy never actually said this--is that showing off my assets may, in fact, make me feel more confident. By throwing my shoulders back and sticking my chest out, I physically take up more room, and I take unneeded stress off my back. I'd consider that a power pose. Bustygirl may not agree with that statement, though--the girls tend to get in the way and make us feel less confident sometimes.
 |
| "Oh hai guys. We gon' do this interview, or wut?" |
Or even...if you're an interviewer, don't open the interview with that poor candidate looking like this. If we tend to complement one another's nonverbals, then wouldn't it follow for the candidate to become a little smaller? a little less confident? I mean...unless you're trying to weed out the faint of heart...
We place a lot of stock in first impressions, and body language has a lot to do with first impressions. We take our cues on how to approach a person based on how much space they take up in a room.
One of the questions I had for Ms. Cuddy was how to properly manage the dominance levels in the room. If you're on a team of equals, how can you still feel confident and comfortable voicing your own opinions without taking up so much space as to make your teammates feel less confident?
I think she kind of answers that question in this blog following Political Posturing--and how candidates' postures affect how much people like them. In addition to confidence, there are other factors by which we judge people.
So on teams, being confident in yourself is important, but having warmth and patience for your teammates will help everyone feel more comfortable and more trusting of one another.
Looking confident will help you feel confident. Go into your interviews and throw back your shoulders. Politely take up just the right amount of space. Hell, do what Amy Cuddy says and strike a power pose in the bathroom before you head in. Whatever you do, just make sure that you're comfortable in that interview. As you know, confidence is attractive--and if you get that position, you deserve a victory lap.
Happy TEDtalk Tuesday, everyone.
It's always interesting when I write a blog...I always end up with something different than I envisioned when I began writing. It took me an hour to write this and post it, and I distinctly remember that I was going to bring up something different--another angle on the whole body language thing, but now I can't remember what it was, and I don't even think it's relevant anymore.
ReplyDeleteare you sure the different angle wasn't the section on breasts? :] (i enjoyed/related to that link btw).
ReplyDeletei was shocked by the discovery that even people who haven't seen this "winner" pose, involuntarily do it as a sign of pride- i always figured it was something you pick up as a kid watching tv! also, i use fake it til you make it when i'm upset- my partner always tells me to SMILE when i'm acting "poopy." usually i give the scariest/creepiest smile, but it does make me aware of how i might be perceived as silly by anyone outside of my head. i guess this is similar to when my dad used to make me look in the mirror when i was a kid bawling about those little-kid things; i'd laugh at my swollen eyes or my nose dripping with boogers :]
What a terrifically abrupt ending! Hope you slept well :)
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